My XX-Girlfriend

Her name is Shaina Naomi Escribano. The love of my life. We were together for 11 months and then i screwed it up. And we dated for another 2 months and i screwed it up again. She's very sweet, kind, forgiving, LOVING, humourous, and smart. I used to think that i was going to spend the rest of my life with her. I wish that we dated our last two years of high school than our first two years of high school, because i was a very immature and ignorant boy my first two years of high school. But i think if i was measured to what i knew then, i was a good boyfriend. But now that i look back on how i treated Shaina and our relationship, I realize how immature and ignorant I was, because i'm more mature and wiser now. Our first kiss was on her birthday. I loved hugging her and holding her hand, i think she loved doing the same thing to me too. I don't understand why i dont have a girlfriend, i know that i'm a lot better than some of these guys at our school that i know how to treat girl, but somethings just dont happen when you want them to. God works in mysterious ways. I can't fathom Him. He has a plan and all i can do is just live my life and let His plan go into its order. I fear not being a husband and father. That would really hurt me if God won't let me have those precious opportunites in this one and only life that i have on Earth.